Dreams and Favorites

I’ve been dreaming a little these days. Today’s dream was about a man coming home after a long time away. He was struggling to come home because he was ashamed of his actions and it had been many, many years since he saw his parents. He was into drugs or maybe he wasn’t on his medication, not sure. He struggled. He had a partner and together they were going down a dangerous path. Instead of allowing each other to grow, they seemed to spiral more and more out of control. Eventually, he walked away. I watched him in a cab headed down a woodsy road that seemed to lead to nowhere until a house appeared among the trees. His father greeted him and held him. The father was taking his time bringing him into the house for the mother because it’s as if he didn’t believe his own eyes. His son came home.  The mother cried. But she just sat down in shock mostly. She wondered why he stayed away so long and other motherly concerns for a son that was obviously very sick.

I told my daughters this morning (in different ways because of their age difference) that they could always come home no matter what. I explained that their home would always be theirs and nothing should make them doubt that security. And I also explained that even if I wasn’t lucky enough to be in that home when they are much, much older, home would still be there for them.

I had an epic kind of dream the other day, but I didn’t write it down and I know my daughter doesn’t remember it after me talking to her about it. It was a good one though. I’ll try to write them down more often.

Also, there was this article I read today about stopping your children from having unhealthy relationships from relatives that are emotionally abusive. Do you know someone who plays favorites? This is where one particular child is favored over the others.  Playing favorites is such a scarring form of abuse that people rarely think about and I happen to be in a situation like that. I see it playing out, one child as more special by a family member. I’ve finally had enough. I sent the article to the family member directly and then I posted it on Facebook for everyone to see and contemplate their own relationships. As a woman who has dealt with emotional abuse, I absolutely must not tolerate it towards my children. It’s hard. The behavior is as old as time. But it’s not right. I’m glad a friend posted it on their page and didn’t just keep it to themselves. It is important to dispel the negativity.


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